How can you build a meaningful career, and why doesn’t professional success always guarantee fulfillment? Psychotherapist and coach Mihaela Sandu-Scarlat talks about IKIGAI, burnout, impostor syndrome, and the steps needed to create a professional life aligned with personal values.
In this article, Mihaela Sandu-Scarlat, cognitive-behavioral psychotherapist, coach, and career counselor, shares insights about the difference between a career lived with purpose and one built solely around performance and external validation. Drawing from her 16+ years of experience in corporations and therapeutic practice, she explains how the Japanese concept of IKIGAI can influence career choices, emotional balance, and the risk of burnout.
„During my 16 years of working in organizations across various industries, I have met hundreds of people who came to and left the company smiling, but also hundreds of people who got bored quickly, who were constantly frustrated, demotivated, sad, and some of whom eventually broke down.
The difference between them was always represented by the meaning they gave to their work, whether their job was an endless routine or, on the contrary, no two days were alike. These people embraced both recurring activities and unexpected challenges with openness, celebrated both small achievements and major victories, and started and ended their workdays with a sense of gratitude.
The second category focused excessively on the half-empty side of the glass, frequently compared themselves to colleagues, and constantly aimed for higher positions, hoping for professional fulfillment that faded away relatively quickly.
Even salary increases satisfied them, on average, for only four months; their lifestyle would receive a new upgrade, and then dissatisfaction would return. This led to the endless pursuit of another objective that they believed could bring them satisfaction. They overlooked small victories, considering them natural and unworthy of praise, while major achievements were celebrated occasionally, quarterly, in a corporate setting, sometimes in a state of exhaustion, displaying a formal smile while thinking about the upcoming weekend, when they could simply lie on the couch.
Unfortunately, I listened to many colleagues who confessed that they were waiting for the weekend just to lie down and recover, even though they were under 40 years old. They had given up all their hobbies because they no longer had the energy, nor the desire to spend the money they had worked so hard for. Again and again.
Many of them were actually saving that money for difficult times, in case something happened to the company or they could no longer keep up with the overly demanding lifestyle.
The weekend was too short to help them recover from exhaustion, and then they would start all over again, waiting for the next weekend.
Burnout does not only settle into the lives of those who are not living their IKIGAI and who work exclusively for the organization’s goals and profit. It can also insidiously affect entrepreneurs who fully live their IKIGAI and immerse themselves completely in work. In their case, it becomes a fire that consumes them, one they cannot, or do not want to, extinguish.
We also often see cases of professionals in the medical system, people who do what they love, who are role models in their field, who contribute to the well-being of society, yet still fall into the abyss of burnout, even while fully living their IKIGAI.
Gallup studies from recent years report alarming figures: 76% of employees say they have experienced burnout “sometimes,” while 28% say they feel it “very often” or “always.”
Living your IKIGAI does not protect you from burnout if you do not slow down at the right moment, nor does it protect you from impostor syndrome if it is not understood, accepted, and managed.
Living your IKIGAI starts with a talent, but it also requires cultivating it, perseverance, and continuous training in order to achieve exceptional results in a field.
In their book The Ikigai Journey, Héctor García and Francesc Miralles mention four key questions that contribute to identifying one’s IKIGAI. These are: What do you love to do? What are you good at? What can you be paid for? What does the world need?
The order of these questions is very important because if you start with what you love to do and continuously improve your level of competence, you may eventually earn a great deal of money. Conversely, if your motivation is predominantly financial, we are talking about an attraction that may be temporary and can lead to a lack of meaning or to an exhausting Sisyphean labor, where work is not aligned with your values and goals.
These essential questions, together with the question “What makes you feel alive?”, are addressed in career counseling and coaching sessions.
Various saboteurs can interfere with discovering or living one’s IKIGAI, among the most evident being perfectionism, impostor syndrome, victimization, or people-pleasing behavior.
Here, I recommend a useful tool for identifying these saboteurs, which you can access for free here: https://positiveintelligence.com/saboteurs/
I further recommend working with a coach to help adjust the intensity of these inner saboteur voices and to gradually build a career that truly represents who you are.”
Mihaela Sandu-Scarlat is a cognitive-behavioral psychotherapist, coach, and career counselor with more than 16 years of experience in corporations across various industries, as well as relevant experience in private practice.
She has helped numerous employees and entrepreneurs find the right path for themselves, whether they were at the beginning of their careers, going through transitions, or pursuing professional reconversion.
A career built in alignment with your values, talents, and inner needs can become an authentic source of energy and fulfillment. However, even when we live our IKIGAI, balance remains essential. Becoming aware of personal limits, managing inner saboteurs, and cultivating gratitude are important steps toward a healthy and sustainable professional life.
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